The Truth Be Told, Lawyers don’t lie???

A lawyer had a wife and 12 children and needed to move as his rental agreement was coming to an end for the home where he lived but was having difficulty in finding a new home.

When he said he had 12 children, no one would rent a home to him because they knew that the children would destroy the home.

He could not say that he had no children, he could not lie, after all, lawyers can not and do not lie. So, he had an idea : he sent his wife for a walk to the cemetery with 11 children. He took the remaining one with him to see homes with the Real Estate Agent.

He liked one of the homes and the agent asked, “How many children do you have ?”

He answered, “12 children.”

The agent asked, “Where are the others ?”

The lawyer answered, with a sad look, “They are in the cemetery with their mother.”

And that’s the way he was able to rent a home for his family without lying.

MORAL: It is not necessary to lie, one only has to choose the right words. Lawyers don’t lie… they are creative.
– By

Posted by Damian

You can’t beat an Indian!!!

An indian engineer can’t find a job so he opens a clinic and puts a sign outside ‘GET TREATMENT FOR $20 – IF NOT CURED GET BACK $100
A lawyer thinks this is a great opportunity to earn $100 and goes to the clinic…
Lawyer:  “I have lost my sense of taste”
Indian:  “Nurse, bring medicine from box no. 22 and put 3 drops in patient’s mouth”
Lawyer:  “Ugh..this is kerosene”
Indian:  “Congrats, your sense of taste is restored. Give me $20”
The annoyed lawyer goes back after a few days to recover his money…
Lawyer:  “I have lost my memory. I cannot remember anything”
Indian:  “Nurse, bring medicine from box no. 22 and put 3 drops in his mouth”
Lawyer (annoyed):  “This is kerosene. You gave this to me last time for restoring my taste”
Indian: “Congrats. You got your memory back. Give me $20”
The fuming lawyer pays him, and then comes back a week later determined to get back $100.
Lawyer:  “My eyesight has become very weak”
Indian:  “Well, I don’t have any medicine for that, so take this $100”
Lawyer (staring at the note): “But this is $20, not $100”
Indian:  “Congrats, your eyesight is restored. Give me $20”

You can’t beat an Indian 😛

Thanks Jason for sending this my way.

Posted by Damian

Lawyer’s Love Letter!

Ever wondered how a lawyer could write a love letter to his girlfriend? To …..,

Sub: Offer of love!

Dearest Ms ……,
1. That I am very happy to inform you that I have fallen in Love with you since the 8th of August (Wednesday).

2. That with reference to the meeting held between us on the 12th of Aug. at 15:00hrs, I would like to present myself as a prospective lover.

3. That our love affair would be on probation for a period of three months and depending on compatibility, would be made permanent.

4. That needless to say and of course, upon completion of probation, I propose that there will be a continuous ‘on the job training’ and performance appraisal schemes leading up to promotion from lover to spouse.

5. That I propose that the expenses incurred for coffee and entertainment would initially be shared equally between us.

6. That I further propose that later, based on our mutual performance, I might take up a larger share of the expenses.

7. That however I am broad-minded enough to be taken care of, on your expense account.

8. That I humbly request you to kindly respond within 30 days of receiving this letter, failing which, this offer would be cancelled without further notice and I shall be considering someone else.

9. That I wish to add here that I would be happy, if you could forward this letter to your sister, if you do not wish to take up this offer.

Wish you all the best!

Thanking you in anticipation.

Please reply if you desire so…
Yours sincerely,

Mr. …

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